Good Morning,
I’m frustrated with myself for so many reasons. 1. sometimes I think I’m a no good very bad parent. I mean why do I have to give girl child such a hard time at 6 am? Actually she’s very lucky her father didn’t want to wake her at 11 last night when we found all the coffee cups she HID behind her toilet in her bathroom.
How did we find them? We followed the SMELL… OMG. She said “i put them there” I pointed out that on the floor was putting them somewhere but that BEHIND the toilet was hiding them. I also pointed out that she can’t SMELL it because she’s SMOKING. Oy. She’s so busy wanting to help Shannon and her friend that her chores are not getting done. And yes she has a lot of chores but OH well, I work full time and I am selfish and I need help. My house would not be such a mess if she did not live with me. My house would not be so cluttered. I would not be so poor. I spoil her with gifts and clothes and treats. Her father gets off easy. Yes he does. And I guess sometimes I get resentful.
But that’s not what’s frustrating me. What’s frustrating me is that I’ve forgotten how to edit pages on WordPress. and I’m going to have to ask Aaron yet again. He’s so smart and he’s patient but still I can’t help but feel sometimes he thinks of me as just an old annoying lady to placate.. He’s a good kid his momma raised him right…
Scale was up today but still under 220 so I think I’m safely out of 220s now. at least for this go round. I’ve not set a drop dead number yet… I just wonder how low I can go.
My back is starting to hurt badly again… I’ll call the doctor later when they open and get an appointment for next week. NOT a good thing. Tammie would like to know which vertebra is irritated so she can work with it. I just want my back to stop hurting.
Woo-hoo I made it to Monday. I made it to Monday and the scale said 219.6. That’s 2TEEN! I made the teens. I am about 13 pounds higher than my lowest South Beach Diet weight ever. I did south beach diet (which btw is a GREAT plan) from May 2006 through August 2008… I got very very very frustrated when I could NOT get below 200 pounds. I was close… so close… actually hung around 21 0 but saw 206 a couple of times.. but PLEASE… 2 years to lose 80 pounds.
I’m down now 33 pounds in 11 weeks. so I’m losing about 3 pounds a week… (average)… Now I’m sure TOMORROW I will show a gain up past 220 but that’s ok.. that’s my pattern.
Today is meet Tammie the Trainer at the gym. glad to know my back is just an ‘irritated disc’ so I’m on steroids again. I guess I have to admit that NOT being able to take NSAIDS is a bit annoying but there are other things we can do…. steroids in low doses occasionally aren’t going to kill me….
My food is good. tasty… small amounts. it’s always my fluids and my calcium that are killing me. I never get enough fluids. I do get enough protein but only if I drink some every day… and If ind that the more protein I get the more I lose so I’m working it….
Well well well I never post here. I’m so busy over at Obesity Help ‘s RNY board that I just never get over here. And I should. This is my attention whore place is it not?
So let’s see… weight loss sucks. I have to stay off the scale. Seriously. I’ve lost around 30 pounds in 10 weeks. now this is not bad…. and I should be THRILLED. but I’m not. I want a regular steady loss NOT an average. I know i’m averaging over 3 pounds a week but STILL… ARRGGHHH…
I’m in the gym. IN fact, I see the trainer 2 times a week and I take yoga at least once a week. And I’m doing CARDIO too. ugh.
Potty issues abound. I take COLACE and Fiber but it’s not as helpful as I would like.
I just wish I knew I was doing ok…