Ethnic Chicken

Nothing Ethnic, Maybe some Chicken, Mostly Nessa

Memorial Day 2010…

We had fun….  went to Norman and Amy’s.  IN attendance were Norman and Amy (of course it was their house), Toby and Michele, Tony and Cher, Ted and Lauren and us.

We ate, we drank, we made merry… we gamed.  I got eaten by mosquitoes…

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You want to lose HOW MUCH more?

Went out with the BFF today… we’ve been friends for way too long… too long to admit.  We were young when we met… I was in my 20s… we’ve raised 4 kids between us… had a few husbands… finally have it figured out and life is good for both of us.  She’s loved me fat or thin, redhead or not… I’m a goof and she’s my rock… the stable normal one to my insanity…. but it works well for us.

Anyway today was SHOPPING… (and lunch)…. we went to Arundel Mills Mall in hopes of finding CLINIQUE BONUS TIME…. we did not find it but we did find CLINIQUE…  and some clothes…for me… and some books for both of us… but I digress.  I got jeans today… SIZE 14.   So why do I feel FAT?  a year ago I was nearly size 26 again… I”m down to size 14 and I feel like a failure and I feel fat….  Sometimes.

The 14’s looked GOOD…. felt GOOD…. were on sale….. I swear I may wear them with the tags on….  wondering what the weather is tomorrow…I got some cute tops too.  And beige corduroys for my STEAMPUNK costume for the SteamPunk World’s fair next month… they were 16s… I bet I could have done them in 14… Tops are still XL but that’s for the boobs… I’m thinking 40DD still… noticing bad skin under my arms now… might have been the bra I was wearing…

oh i did get 6 tanks for under clothes… size large cause i like them SNUG….

did some more shopping later with DH that included some new WORK-IT camis and some sports bras….

But that’s so NOT what I want to talk about today here…   Donna and I were sitting at Chili’s having lunch…. (and I eat pretty normally now… I had the inside of half a wrap with chicken and a couple of french fries and brought the rest home…) and she asked me how much more I wanted to lose…. well I’m at about 185 now.  I think I want to SETTLE at 155… I was a size 10 20 years ago at that weight so I bet I’ll be an 8 now?  Sizes have so changed ya know…. so I told her FORTY more pounds….  that gets me to 145 and gives me 11 pounds bounce back room… Well she pointed out how good I looked at 155… so I’m really close to being at goal.  I am 29.x  pounds from permanent goal weight and 39.x from lowest weight ever…  that’s NOT A LOT….  IF I continue losing an average of 2 pounds per week I am about 4 months away from permanent  goal….  and less than 5 months from bounce back weight and I can’t see this happening.   or maybe I can and that scares me to death…

I just can’t wrap my head around the fact that I might get to goal…. maybe that’s why I set my goal so low… so that I’d never get there…. who knows.

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A new day a New beginning

Hi OH HI….  Hello….  HI THERE!   (do you speak dog?  cause that’s how I talk to the pups…)

It’s THURSDAY…. a bright sun-shiny spring day in Baltimore… which is about as good as I can come up with.

Today is LUNCH WITH THE BFF…  that’s how the invite came…   love that girl. have for nearly 20 years…. long before she loved me I knew we would be buds… she’s saved my life a few times in every sense of the word…   I would travel almost anywhere for her…  oh wait, I have….  the ADD tour of the south 2 summers ago was one of my favorite vacations ever.   TEN days in a VAN with her… driving from city to city to get some furniture to her darling daughter in TEXAS….  this trip involved a pilgrimage to GRACELAND… oh and drunk dialing my darling husband from NOLA  but that’s another story for another time…

So there was a blow up at southbeachfriends yesterday.  My fault.  Truly.  I was snarky.   Yes I was.   BUT I really feel that I was snarky BACK.    The key is at least I ADMIT to being a bitch….  an evil SNARKY bitch while those that I snarked at think they did nothing wrong.  How sad for those that live in imaginary worlds where they are wanted.  NO ONE BELONGS WHERE THEY’RE NOT WANTED  (I’ve got that song on right now… What You Didn’t Say) I love Mary Chapin Carpenter and have for years and years and years.   She was my gateway to Country Music.

Who invented the word SNARKY???  it’s such a good word.   Ok I looked it up. It’s a 1906 british slang term from  1866 SNARK…  meaning irritable who knew?   I thought it was an internet thing…  as now it’s used to mean a cranky response… as in  NESSA was SNARKY to  <insert the name of whomever I was snarky to today> when she said <insert my most passive/aggressive mean spirited comment here>.

Sadly for folks  I’m always snarky when I OWN THE SITE and can do so.     What’s really sad is that I’m not even going to the site today.   Not cause I’m afraid to see what was said   who the hell cares what they think.  I’m not going because I’m waiting to calm down enough to just be able to say “WHATEVER” to them.

The truth is there are several people at  SBF that I don’t want there but since I can’t see a reason to remove them other than I don’t like their motives, I can’t justify it.  At least not in my mind.    Not that they don’t think I will remove them.  AND that is the KEY to why they are the way they are.  THEY HAVE NO CLUE WHO  I AM OR WHAT I’M ABOUT.  How sad for them.

I know there are webmasters that rule with an iron fist and it’s my way or the highway… and they seem to think that I’m censoring them.   ummm  NO!  Censoring them would mean I delete their posts and deactivate their accounts.      Some of them are even attempting to  set up ‘reading accounts’  in the fear that I will deactivate them.   I f that’s what they think they need to do, I can understand why I don’t want them there, because they don’t grasp that although I totally disagree with their thought patterns, their beliefs and their motives, I will allow them their delusions and freedom AT THAT SITE.  Yes I will.   Truth be told,  while I OWN it.  it’s not MINE… THIS IS MINE.   I delete users here daily.   I moderate EVERY SINGLE POST here.  and will continue to do so….  Aaron and I are the ONLY moderators here.  But the SBF site,  well  their belief that I censor is just ludicrous.

I know I’m going to have to go to the site soon.  I know i have to deal with this insanity.   Today I do not. Today is send the Critical Patch letter day at work.  Today is not a good day for me to play with whiners.

Today’s health report:

There was no dinner last night there was noshing… half a protein bar, have a protein tidbit, got home had some imitation crab and some bacon horseradish cheddar then ate  pudding, banana strawberries and chopped pecans with whipped cream… oy such a diet…   but there was serious exercise yesterday…half an hour on the arc trainer,  an hour of yoga that left my knee hurting so badly I have an appointment with  the ortho knee guy on Tuesday… probably to ask about a brace since today the knee is feeling much better… yesterday I thought for sure I was going to need surgery. I know i have a misplaced Baker’s Cyst and a partially torn meniscus which may or may not now be totally torn due to use…  SERIOUS use…  Yoga three times a week is really stressing the knee but I need the YOGA so I can walk the rest of the week…. and to keep my brain sane…  I do have some transfer addiction clearly…

I would do a yoga class every morning if they offered it at the gym…

oh the scale this morning:  185.4.   amazing.  it was 189 when i went to bed.  WHY I got on the scale last night I have no idea.   but i did and i expected 187 or so this morning… Yay me!

today:

commute:  click/designer whey/milk/coffee

breakfast:   none

lunch:  applebees with donna

snack:  cheese or protein bar or both half a banana

dinner:  no clue

snack:  dried fruit I”m sure no potty this morning.

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The Hershey Weekend…

Sunday April 4, 2010

How did we get to Sunday already?  Oh because we went away this weekend… and it was GREAT…

Saturday morning, Norman, Amy and Lee (sans hubby John) made it to our house around ten and we headed up to Hershey PA.   One of the reasons we bought our van was just for trips like this… 5 adults in one van… worked great… we could have done 6 even if needed…  We were blessed with BEAUTIFUL WEATHER….

Arriving in Hershey we stopped at Applebees for lunch.  Oy… it was fun.

So we drove up to Hershey Gardens… and we walked through the gardens… and took some fun shots walked around for a few hours..


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PINKS

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Nessa and Brian

A private moment captured by Norman

We hit the gift store and I got a ladybug necklace and a butterfly magnet.   Then we checked in at the hotel (an awesome choice for location as it was a mile from the  Hershey Theatre (a small about 1700 people) intimate location for our TSO Concert and close to Hershey Park and hit Dukes of Hershey for dinner.  It turned out to be an awesome choice and all had fun… and good food… the awesome TSO concert.   We had good seats… and Brian and I were both comfortable sitting in the seats, which was a total NSV for both of us…

The next morning we got up and discovered the toilet was stopped up.   Thankfully Lee went downstairs and we had a guy up to fix the toilet in like 5 minutes.  I was impressed.  We went down for breakfast and I was sad…. NO BACON.  I had a protein shake some juice cut with water and some coffee.  I survived.  I do admit to missing the ability to have an English muffin or a waffle but I survived.  Then we went to Chocolate World and we took the  Chocolate Tour all the while reminiscing about the days when we could walk through the Hershey factory… oy we’re old.  We got the tour picture and I think that I look like a tiny doll next to Brian…

Brian knew the picture was coming... I think I look so small next to him...

After the Tour we went to the store… we got some mugs… and I got them with chocolate so I can take it to work to share with my co-workers.   I had some really really good coffee… then we went to Indian Echo Caverns where we took a tour of the caverns.   I got a lovely bright blue hoodie… it says Hershey but the color is awesome. Also got some serious ladybug stuff…

Then we stopped at  The Soda Jerk Diner and the waitress was awesome, the food was awesome and the fun was awesome.    Sadly it appears the website has been hacked so I’m not going to link to it.  I did get a really cute shirt there too.

It was a GREAT weekend and it was so much fun to be with our friends.

Here are more pictures:   Hershey Photos

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02/26/10- A Snowy Friday’s Thoughts..

Good Morning!

up at 5 am and it’s SNOWING in Baltimore.   and BLOWING… oy the wind is really bad.  I don’t mind snowing but I HATE blowing.. I hate WIND… hate it hate it hate it.

Well anyway I was up, i folded a few items of clothing and helped brian get going this morning.  he’s frustrated he’s up two pounds. I told him it’s water weight and he’s stressed and retaining water from his injuries but  he doesn’t believe me.   I wish I could make Brian love Brian.  I wish there was a magic pill.  There is not, sadly.

Anyway, after Bri left for work, I grabbed a quick shower and hit the GYM.  I did 30 minutes on the Arc Trainer at Strength level 4 which is a tough workout for me… then I took Tammie’s 7 am yoga class.  I did not feel like I was doing so great in the class… I fell out of postures and needed to break 2 times during the class.  but I know I’m better than I was 6 months ago…

I managed to get to work by 8:30 which is great.  I will hopefully have lunch with Angie today.  NOT sure where we are going yet..

Did I mention that I signed us up for the STEAMPUNK WORLD’S FAIR in Piscataway NJ in May?  Brian and I are going for the weekend…  Steampunk is my new passion…   not sure what I am going to do with it yet as I’m just into the fashion and form part of it at this point.  Seems rather shallow of me.

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1/17/10 Sunday after the Loss

Norman, Ted Marcy and John Playing Thurn and Taxis


Finally Learned to play Hamburgum

the team that went to the semi finals at euroquest

So after we gamed with our dear friends, we went to Pickles Pub to see our other dear friends my Weight Loss Surgery gang… we partied hard even to the bitter end of the Ravens losing.   Oh well they just get STUPID when they see the Colts…

here we are:

I'm so SHORT... or Brian is so TALL

who is this?

I'm amazing myelf

some of the girls

Kelly Me, April Jilly

so there are more pictures in the gallery but I can’t figure out how to link to it.  I’ll have to ask Aaron.

anyway… it’s all good… I have things to go do with the kiddo…


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7/10/09–It’s FRIDAY

July 10, 2009 Friday…

Yay it’s FRIDAY!  yesterday was a great day. it was a hectic day. it’s been a stressful few days. hopefully today will start a restful period in our lives.

and it is OUR lives.  As a married person you do not live in a vacuum (why can I never spell that word???).

yesterday was a busy day.

we went for our visit with Sloane the nutritionist at our Doctor’s office.  it was Brian’s final weigh in and he lost ANOTHER 11 pounds.  the man is incredible.  so month one he lost 12!

then he gained 4 so he had a net loss of 8

then he lost 11 so he had a net loss of 19

then the next month he lost another 11 so he has a net loss of 30 pounds in 4 months  GO BRIAN!

I gained 6

I gained 4

I stayed the same

I lost 4

net gain 6 pounds in 4 months.

Either way since i lost and I have my head on straight… we were BOTH presented to DVR for our approvals!  Yay.   now our paperwork goes to Rose and is sent off to insurance.

Today I have to “nag” bri to get that chest XRAY done and I have to call Carroll Hospital about his CPAP.

After the doctor yesterday we went to have lunch with friends… Angie and Sylive who I know from http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/MD/a,messageboard/ which is a great place for support and making friends.   Strong personalities abound there so be forewarned…I’m one of them and I can be a big bully.  Sadly I’m not the only one.  I do think I’m the only one that admits it however.  Maybe I’m wrong.  But I don’t think so.  And I’m getting validation from lurkers so that helps!

anyway, after lunch we had to rush over to Amy’s to be with her.  Giles her cat is very sick and she was very upset and that’s what friends do.  Sadly being the ADHD moron that I am I stood my friend Nancy up.  We had plans to meet at the house at 3 and I totally forgot because of the Giles Crisis.  I feel so bad.

we gamed with Amy and then brian and I went to Olive Garden for Dinner.  it was good but both of us ate a lot more food than we should have and both of us ended up with upset tummies of one type or another.

i’m here at work now. got here at SIX! posted on OH before I left the house.  I had time.

I miss FACEBOOK at work but what’s a gal to do?

Lunch today with my BFF (NOT) ROSE  (although since ROSE is the nice lady at DVR’s office that puts our insurance in Maybe she is my new BFF)

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7/6/09

July 6, 2009

7:42 a.m.

Morning all…

well the weekend was great.

we went gaming at  N and As on Friday  and it was fun.  dinner was fun too.   but of course not healthy…. (sorry N….)  chicken fried rice, egg drop soup and pot stickers…

saturday we went to Janet’s Party.  Sarah was there.  it was fun.  Her house is very nice in a lovely part of town.  we stayed much later than expected…  and even brian had fun.

sunday I took Harley and and Hannah to the dog beach.  hannah retrieved for about an hour… harley actually went wading on his own… he’s getting it.  I might go back tonite! it’s a 35 minute drive to get  there so it’s not a quick trip at all…

scale was stupid this morning the first weigh (256.4) seemed excessively low, the I was up one pound, then I was up two pounds…  and then I gave up.  I suck.  I doubt that I will show a loss this week yet again…. Not sure what I’m going to do…


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04/23/09

Hello there.

Late start this morning.   did not get to work till 7:15.  amazing that I think this is late.

girl child is upset. her boyfriend thinks he wants to break up to ‘experience other girls’  UGH.  I told her to tell him “don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out”   at least he’s being honest and not cheating on her.   oy I”m so glad i’m NOT 16 anymore.  poor kid.

Bri is off today, it’s take your rug rat to work day… so his school system is closed.  it used to be a huge deal… now it’s not… at least not for me.  but then my kids are grown…

food yesterday was ok… today we will see I already at 9:45 a.m have heartburn.

I heard they will fix the hiatal hernia i have when i have surgery.

Lunch yesterday was da bomb.  I love the WLS girls from Obesity Help.   one is 4 months out one is a year out one is 18 months out one is 6 months out one 3 months out and one one month out… ugh and me… the only pre-op!  and the only one who made all gone with my salad… oh well soon will be my time.


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04/08/09

Good Morning….. well such that it is.  last night I got home, got brian and girl child and we went to see Toby and Michele and Wiley their 13 yr old Corgi.  tonite at 5:15 Wiley goes to the Bridge.  For those that don’t know about Rainbow Bridge  here is the poem.  but be WARNED.. if you have ever lost a pet and you are not made of stone you will cry.  I CRY and I’m a cold hearted Bitch.


Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….


Author unknown…

I am the driver for tonite.  after all Michele took me when I had to put Bagel down in September.  UGH what a horrible thing.  T and M have no children and Wiley is their baby.  My heart breaks for them.  But sadly it’s the natural order of things when we love pets.  they DO NOT LIVE long enough.  and it’s time.  Poor pup’s been in a dog wheelchair for a year…


Anyway Back to my insanity (as if my friends was NOT enough…)  I binged yesterday AND I did not exercise.  AND my stomach is still UPSET AND I have to go get on the scale for the nutrition visit today at the doctors AND I’m betting I’m going to be told that i’m too out of control for the surgery.

I’m sure Brian did not do much better as we’ve both been bad.



I KNOW this surgery is not magic.  I KNOW it can’t fix my head.   I know that I have to learn to just NOT care about food and not want to eat and not put shit in my mouth.   I KNOW this.  And the funny thing is  I LIKE good food.  I also like BAD food.  and I’m lazy.

I admit it.  I admit I want the surgery as soon as possible.   Brian wants it in June.  Ugh.  I could go probably early or mid May and get a jumpstart on him.  Maybe I’ll have to the doctor talk to him about it or the LCSW….  Maybe part of my problem is that I’m ANGRY that he wants/needs to go first and he’s putting it off… and he’s fucking around.

He was told he needs to lose 25 pounds.  he’s doing jack shit about it.

anyway… dinner tonite will be screwed up again.  I have to get control.  soon.

ETA:  brian lost 12 pounds!  I gained 4.  ugh.  but it spurred me on to make a good dinner.

i took toby and chele to the vet for wiley.  toby is very very sad.


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