OMG! just OMG! how to put this all into words (and without pictures since they are on facebook and I cannot get to them at this time… hopefully when I am home I will remember to add them…)
Let’s do the time line… it will be easier…
Thursday August 19th
after dinner I went to get my good Friend Nikki so that her car could stay at her momma’s house. Thus began my fun. We got to my house and Girl Child’s WONDERFUL strong boyfriend moved all the stuff into the van for us. Nik and I managed to hang out and still get to bed around 12 am ish I believe. I dyed my hair, I packed. not much but enough in fact still yet again I packed more than I needed… but it was good nevertheless….
Friday August 20th… TRAVEL DAY
The alarm was set for 4:45. Debbie (we must get her a blog so I can link for her too) was very early and tried knocking on the door, calling the cell phones and getting no response… she ended up calling the house phone and up we got.. I let her in, woke Nikki… (she’s so NOT pleasantly awake at 0′dark:30)… I had showered the night before when I did my hair so I was grab and go… Nik got a shower and we grabbed a few things and after kissing my hubby off we went… (I was the only one that kissed him btw)….
WE got on 70 going West. This was my first going west trip ever… we drove. we had Garmin with us. My lovely Garmin Nuvi Wide Screen with the British voice (cause the American girl WHINES)…. She also tells me how fast I’m going but I ignore her mostly…
AND I got a SPEEDING TICKET…. deserved…. truly. Yes Mr. Ohio Police Officer I was going 1-20 miles over the limit… I clocked me at 77 you allege I was doing 80 I like easy numbers to work with so 15 over the limit works for me… 80 in a 65… skies sunny, traffic light… all on the ticket.. the $100.00 ticket. NO POINTS in MD for this… and I thought it would be more than 100 dollars… so I see the cop, hit the brakes and see him start to move… i pull to the right.. and tell Debbie and Nik.. “he got me”… Debbie didn’t think so but I knew… and yeppers he pulled behind me and flashed the lights and OVER I went… NO PROBLEM…. at least not for me… poor Debbie was horrified… “tell him you were keeping up with traffic” she said… “nope I wasn’t. I WAS speeding… he got me I earned it…” and I did. I was speeding. I had Nik find the registration and Debbie got my license… I rolled down the windows and he walks over to the Passenger side of the van… he was very polite if not a bit confused… as you will see:
I roll down the window and say hello and acknowledge before he can say anything that I know I was speeding… I had him my license and registration. I’m forgetting that my license says I weigh 240 pounds… and has a picture of me at 240 pounds…. (i had NOT lied on the last license since 240 was down from where I had been and I was thrilled with that) I weigh about 165 now but I look nearly 20 pounds lighter than that….
Ohio Officer: “I clocked you at 80″
Me: “yes sir i was speeding”
OO: where are you ladies headed?
ME: Cincinnati
OO: are you in a rush?
ME: Yes sir I am. (i thought he was going to be rendered totally speechless at this point)
OO: What do you do for a living? (odd question yes???)
ME: I’m an IT Specialist for the Federal Government
OO: WHAT???
ME: I’m an IT Specialist for the Federal Government (btw that’s ALWAYS what I say not just for his benefit)
OO: oh because on the back of the car is a bumpersticker-
ME: (cutting him off) oh yes that says “my other car is a school bus” yes, this is my husband’s car and he’s a school bus driver and had he been driving we would NOT have been speeding (which is damn true)….
OO: well I’ll be back with the ticket and you can sign and be on your way
he goes and writes the ticket and comes back to me and we chitty chat a bit about stuff and somehow the fact that I’m much smaller now than what’s on my License comes up and I say
ME: well I’ve lost a lot of weight
OO: everywhere but your foot…
which actually was kind of cute…
I did not speed the rest of the trip!
we get to the hotel around 3 pm… unload the car and opt to pay for regular parking… oy I screwed that up too.. bashed in the side of my husband’s van big time with yellow paint and everything… looks horrible. Door still works but it’s bad.. he forgives me… he’s a good guy and I’m a maroon…
we got to our room I shared with Debbie… and then hit the Q and A session…
I came out and found ANDREA and BETH (Melting Mama) and bless Beth the first words out of her mouth were “OMG YOURE SO SKINNY” and she meant it! made me feel great….
and here is where I will stop with part 1… there’s more to come cupcakes and yoga and Clicktinis….
Tags: Andrea, Friends, Melting Mama, Nikki, OH Conference, OHIO, pouch parties, speeding, van damage